Spiders in the Stupa

I woke up screaming this morning at 4.52. J noted the time, as he prefers not to be woken up before 7.00.

I dreamt that I was with a friend, probably my Italian former-flatmate Jonathan, with whom I have enjoyed living and traveling. He's given to mystical musings, and has a deeply philosophical approach to many things, combined with the chance that any little things may drive him batshit. He is a dreamy temperamental sort. I am less dreamy, and often just as cranky.

In the dream Jonathan and I were walking in a crowded city, and looking for a quiet spot to rest and muse. The constant rushing, and racket of the city had gotten to us, and we needed to recover. We might have been in Thailand, it definitely felt very Asian. We might have been Buddhist monks, not sure. We did know that we had been left this Stupa in the middle of the city (by a benefactor, by friends, Airbnb booking, remains unclear). There was a giant gate, and a driveway that sloped down. The compound had lots of trees, overgrown greenery, and a complete absence of people. Some way in there was a beautiful black, red, cream and golden stupa, matching the work on the gate but larger. The top was not domed or pointed but shaped more like a gopuram- so kind of broad haipin like. I have a very clear picture of this still, even though it has been several hours.

We walked up to it, I was a step or two ahead of Jonathan. I walked towards the locked door, and had climbed up the first step when I saw a massive brown, white and yellow spider in the middle of a web that went diagonally across the entry way. It was looking at me, and moved as I started turn to run away.

At this point I freaked out and woke up crying. J rolled over, and had me tell him the dream. When I was done, and whimpering again from fear (I really do not like spiders) he said something which did nothing to make the situation better.

"Maybe it just wanted to give you a hug".

He tried to fix this later by adding "You know, like Charlotte, from the book". But it was too late.

No doubt tonight I shall have terrible dreams about spiders trying to hug me with all 8 legs, J will try to calm me by wrapping himself around me, I will try fight him off as if he were a spider, though he has only half the number of limbs,  and it will end with more frights and flailing, for at least one of us.

Tea-time

I took a nap this afternoon and dreamt that my grandfather was at the door to have tea with me. He was fumbling with his mobile phone because he wasn't quite sure how to use it, alone, and slightly unsure about if he was there at the right time. And it was so disappointing because even in the dream I knew this was wrong- it was him but it could never have been him.

1. My grandfather was always on time; at places at the time he wanted to be at. If he was at my door it was the right time for him to be there. And he would never have been tentative about if it was a good time to see me. It was always a good time to see me. He knew that.

2.  My grandfather knew how to use his mobile phone. The two things he needed to do, disconnect calls and delete text messages without reading, he had mastered. Everything else was unnecessary and there was no uncertainty about this either.

3. We lived together, so there was no reason for him to visit me for tea. Had we lived in the same city we would have been in the same house. This visiting business was for other people. We were intimate enough to sit at the same table every night and eat out of the corner of each others plates. It wasn't the cute quirky thing grandfathers who occasionally see their offspring and dote on them do. It had the slightly competitive tinge of people who live together and know that whoever gets to the chutney first gets to eat more of it. Though we were never like this at tea. Only at breakfast.

But it was nice that he came to visit me while I was napping. There aren't too many other options left to us.

I think the dream was brought on by a deep deep desire to have someone make me a really good cup of tea.